Greetings from the Arctic Circle

Hello friends, I am now in Grand Rapids, Michigan.

For those of you who would tell me that Grand Rapids, Michigan is not in the Arctic Circle, I would like to respectfully stick out my tongue to you and say "BLAAAGH!" Who are you going to trust: some unknown cartologist who randomly drew a line on the globe? or me, a trusted authority who is currently in Grand Rapids, Michigan?

I landed in Grand Rapids, Michigan Tuesday evening at around 6:00. At this time of year Grand Rapids, Michigan has 24 hours of darkness, give or take ten hours. Nevertheless, they chose to build a city on the permafrost, so here I am to celebrate Thanksgiving.

The United States Department of Public Relations would have the world believe that Thanksgiving Dinner is time of gratitude for our blessings. In Grand Rapids, Michigan, however, Thanksgiving Dinner is necessary to put on the body fat needed to survive the twelve months of winter (give or take nine months).

Not only has it snowed here, the temperature is almost FREEZING! Nevertheless, I have braved the elements twice. Yesterday after Thanksgiving Dinner with my family in Holland, Michigan I went out and played kickball with my nieces and nephews. Fortunately, we all returned home after the game was over with just minor frostbite.

Then this morning I once again put on my seal-skins and ventured out to help my mother rake the leaves. One of the trees still hadn't dropped all its leaves, and believe me, I let that tree have it! I knocked all those leaves down, because I wasn't going out to do THAT job again.

Later today I will be getting together with some college friends to inform them that that there is a world outside of the Arctic Circle. If I don't come back from Grand Rapids, Michigan within the next week, send out the St. Bernards.

Thank you.